New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
