it was like his penis was on wheels.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
