Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
