it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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