what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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