Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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