This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
