last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Bring me that man meat
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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