i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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