Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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