Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize