Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
We left the knife in your bed.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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