The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
