And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
