I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Randomize
