no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
