He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
