I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
