Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
