Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
