i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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