You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
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Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
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My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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