dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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