oh god the rape fog is back!
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
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I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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