yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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