it wasn't lemon gatorade
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
