i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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