This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
