Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
he told me I talked like a deaf person
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize