so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
just tell him i said nine months
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
