question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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