8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
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