Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
