I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
