we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Randomize