So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
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