Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize