Your dad touched me again.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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