Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
