well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Actions speak louder than pants.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
