You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize