do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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