Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
