If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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