direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
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He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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