I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
