I need help removing her.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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