What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
