why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Enjoy the penises
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
The air taste purple.
Randomize
