it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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