im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
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