we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
