similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize