How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just gift wrapped bread.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Be still, my beating vagina.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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